<em>Joycee offers Biraj and Lahari a treat at a Golden Palace banquet, Ananda Community, Mountain View, CA, September 9, 2024. Photo by the author. Tech: Canon EOS R6, Canon EF 70-200mm f/2.8L IS II USM.</em>
Dear –
Thanks for sharing beautiful thoughts of Swami and Master. You said earlier that you are waiting for Swamiji to come. I’ve had that “issue” in the past. Less so now, as I’ll explain.
I used to think that if I prayed just right, and got my body, heart, will, mind, and soul arranged just right, that God would come, but not before. But through long experience I’ve come to a very different understanding.
In her book Swami Kriyananda: Lightbearer, Asha tells how Swamiji praised Narayani, who was his personal assistant in the last years of his life. Swamiji said that Narayani had come to help him in many lives, and that her way of relating to him was different than anyone else’s, in that she only ever thought of giving. Swamiji said that it was perfectly right and natural for most of us to want something from him in exchange for our love and labors in service to his work; but that Naryani’s love was of a different order.
I had a powerful demonstration of her love, when I walked into the temple here in the Mountain View community at 7:30 at night to meditate. There was no one in the temple except for Narayani and Shurjo. The moment I sat to meditate, I felt Swamiji’s overwhelming presence. It permeated every atom of the space in the temple, and it was immediate and present as if he were standing there – even more so, actually, for being felt inwardly.
I knew right away that I was being given this experience to encourage me in a lesson that all of us must sooner or later learn. As Swamiji put it to me many years ago, the path is not about waiting for the Guru to come and make everything right. It is about dynamic self-offering.
I can’t tell you how many times I have experienced this truth. Almost always, it resulted in the blessing of an intimate sense of closeness with Swamiji and Master. I would have signed up to serve in some way. Sometimes it would be through singing in the choir. Other times it was through volunteering to take photos at a big Ananda event where, at age 82, I knew that it would tax my physical body. But more, I have learned that in order to serve in the way that would please Swami, I would have to set myself aside and think only of the work at hand. This always required that I work very hard inwardly to be completely sincerely offering myself to the work – the photography, the singing, the working in the garden – so that I would be fully absorbed in just the one thing that I was doing in the moment, where my thought would be completely of giving, by praying and directing my will to do only as Swamiji might guide me.
It made me very un-social at the start of the event – I had no time at all for chitchat or carefree conversation; I was completely focused with all my attention on following the guidance and doing the work. When singing, my prayer was always that we be able to inspire the people in the audience with an experience of their own, to give them the blessing of feeling the high inspiration in the song. Many, many times, Divine Mother made it very difficult for me to get myself out of the way. (Isn’t it always?) But the rewards were always far greater than the effort involved.
This is what I have experienced every time I have served, since the mid-1960s when I found Autobiography of a Yogi and Master and began doing photography and writing. As Swami said, “Before there can be an expansion, there must be a certain grounding first.” In other words, I had to work very hard to give, give, give all of my attention, sincerity, and willingness to do only as would please Swamiji, Master, and God.
Then came the discipline of starting the work, not knowing how it would go, or caring, just persevering and serving and serving and serving. And then, maybe halfway through the event, there would come a wonderful sense of flow, as I was guided in a deeply relaxed way through the silent presence of Swamiji and the Divine within.
And so I learned that it’s true, as he said, that it takes dynamic self-offering, and that he won’t come, ever, if we are passively, or tearfully only praying for him to come. In this age particularly, ours is a very active, outward path, with a special opportunity to find inner communion through helping the work, mission, and cause that the masters are wanting to offer to the world.
I’ve found, also, that I feel Swamiji and Divine Mother most closely when I pray to them to fill my heart with their goodness, kindness, compassion, and sincere friendship to give to others. Master called this the highest prayer: “Divine Mother, give me Thyself, that I might give Thee to others.”
Another very powerful way that I’ve found to feel Swamiji and Divine Mother very close is through Aum meditation. As with most things spiritual, I don’t do it well, but it’s very important that I do it. As Lahiri said, “The only duty that has been given to man is to listen to the inner sounds.” Aum gradually eats away the ego and introduces us to the real world behind this one. It doesn’t matter how deeply we’re able to go, only that we set ourselves going in the direction of becoming instruments for Divine Mother through communion with Her as Aum.
Well, I reckon I’ve said enough. I hope this helps. It’s very, very important to serve, even in the tiniest ways, whether as an instrument to encourage, cheer, and help others, or more directly to help the great work. The blessings that people experience through very simple service – cooking, serving, cleaning – are more important for us than bemoaning the fact, which is also very true, that we can’t yet serve as very advanced souls can.
Master’s Blessings